Transition to success

Well, I just spoke to a friend here in Melbourne. It should be good for people to actually know I have a friend here. With my past 6months history, you could literally say if I had died last month, no one would have found out.

I wasn’t exactly busy, just in hiding from lots of things and people, mainly because I was embarrassed. Embarrassed of what? Erm, long story cut short, how things have unfolded post honours. You know until yesterday, I was still in that self pity mode where I went blah blah blah, this happened to me, so I should be depressed, nobody loves me and I don’t want the love either. Until yesterday. When my course coordinator, bless him really, this really old looking white haired chap with a beer belly (erm…not that big a belly) asked me if I had friends. And I went…..”er, I do have friends here, besides the two who have taken hiatus from studying”

It was an half honest answer. I knew people here, they were friends in my close circle two years ago, right now I don’t even know if I had the right to call them that, friends.The truth is, I had alienated myself from the few friends I had here.

I liked it two years back, seven years back, when I made these friends, I actually liked them, they were a great bunch of friends to have and somehow I had alienated myself from them. Even if I did have a problem, I shouldn’t have done that, whatever the case was, I am an Idiot, I know now. And you know what I actually think I was happy, I hadn’t felt that happy in a long time.

Why? There is a story, a one sided tale which is heavily self centered and it would be selfish of me to tell it here.

Let’s just say, I was an idiot.

I was thinking, it would do me some good to look at problems, socio-economic ones, problems I face with the society at large instead of being selfish for once. Being selfish has taken a huge toil one me and everyone surrounding me, especially my family. I don’t think anyone is born in this world to fail.

We have to try at the very least to succeed and if we don’t atleast we tried. I don’t really want to try to succeed, I want to succeed in my plans and I think I might just succeed.

This is my first entry at being fresh.

We shall see if I keep this up or succumb to the dangers of craziness and seclude myself again.

PEACE Y’ALL